MuSiC oF mY LiFe

~~Wednesday, May 17, 2006~~

since when hav i POSTED eh?

i don't remb alr.

Do i bother? nahz.

Haha. Its a hilarious joke when i tell pple tt i noe TAT i m still holdin' on 2 so many responsibilities till NOW. its been a joke ALREADY when i spent my last whole yr tryin to work hard fer' 2 clubs n helpin out in sch activities 4 exposure n favours. However, jus when ALL or MOST of my frens r enjoyin their life n catchin up wif sch work, i m here STILL, sloggin my life away for wad seemed lyk a LOST cause alr.

Most may NOT noe wad happened...it doesn't matter anymore..cos humans r e most complex figure on Earth to explain i feel... i do nt need pple to noe wad i m goin thru alr cos its too much to even RECALL..i do nt need pple's sympathy cos its nt the RESPONSE i wan..neither do i need COMFORT when i m NT e only 1 suffering...BUT i guess i jus need to see EFFORTS .. SUPPORT n SINCERITY from pple who once got me in this useless pile of shit. U will noe it when u can obviously step away from this pile of shit but ur trusted pals gav u courage to step on it..tellin u tt u wun b alone to STEP INTO THAT PILE OF SHIT..but once u sTEPPED into it, they WALK away...leaving u to CLEAN urself up ALONE..or maybe wif another of ur SILLY fren who FOOLISHLY listened to dem.

this analogy may be highly biased cos e author nw is NOT tinking straight but i guess its hw the way it goes..its MY blog..and there's freedom of speech in here...for ME.

i m always e PERSUASIVE one..the MOLTIVATING one..the SO-CALLED SMART one...the CAPABLE one..but its ALL JUNK when all DUN GIVE u the support when u need dem. ALtho i SERIOUSLY dun wan to admit tt i m getting OLD..i m JUST getting WISER...i beleive that at tis pt of time..ALL SHLD at least hav e common sense to tink and feel as YOUNG ADULTs. ..must i teach? Do we even hav to teach u ALL to be MORE SENSITIVE towards OTHERS? Nt to the case of OVER-REACTING or be PARANOID but at the least care more for everyone.

Its been HELL for me since 2 mths ago..n its NT HELPING if ALL of u ALL are falling apart..U were the ONEs who BROUGHT me up..n NOW..u were the ones who pulled me down..is tis a wicked PRANK tt u wanna play on me? ALRITE u win, i totally LOST it alrite? And its NOT onli me..others suffered too alrite? ENUFF of ALL the nonsense and get a grip, shall we?

DO NOT forgot WHY WE EVER MADE it SO far alrite..remb we BUILD everytink tgr..y tear it down ALTOGETHER with stupid actions n self-centred tots... i DUN see e pt. I realli LOVE u all as pals..but pls dun let me DISLIKE ur atttitudes.. for thy' shall nt tolerate such nonsense.

U all hav made me break my vow...a REAL hard one..u all hav made me sacrifice...a real big one..u all gav me slpless nites n countless probs..n i DUN MIND cos i THOUGHT it was worth it..i nv qn myself y..cos i dun believe in PURE fairness ..but the least is DUN let me QN e worthiness of the causes...cos i HATE to lose the trust i hav wif u all.

I dun MEAN a THING to U ALL..i NOE. Just KILL me, DUN torture me. THANKx.

Anyway, its been a hard day at lab n at sch. Jus a bad day i guess. Wind blow e troubles away. Thankz.......

1:38 AM